Dorothy Ann "Dottie" Durdon

Dottie Durdon – Obituary – Called to heaven on May 17, 2024

Name:  Dorothy Ann (Dottie) Durdon

Survivors: 5 Children Debra Grapensteter (now Debbie Calvert)

                                      Thomas E. Grapensteter (Tommy)

                                      David Grapensteter

                                      Laura Grapensteter

                                      Jeannette Slater

                                      Ex-husband Thomas J. Grapensteter (Tom)

Preceded in death by: her father Anthony Durdon 

  her mother Theresa Durdon (Kocik) 

  and her aunt Helen Kocik.  

Service:    Date:  June 15, 2024

                   Time:  1:00 p.m.

                   Place:  St. John the Baptist Catholic Church, Frenchtown, MT

                   Officiating: Fr. Tom Lankenau

                   Reception: St. John Catholic Church, Parish Center

                   Cemetery: Sunset Memorial Gardens, Missoula, MT

Dorothy Ann (Dottie) Durdon was born in Cleveland, Ohio on September 18, 1940. When Dorothy was 4 years old, her father Anthony passed away. Her mother Theresa asked her sister Helen to move in and help raise Dorothy. Helen, who never married, took good care of little Dorothy Ann (and throughout her entire upbringing), as the homemaker of the household, while Dorothy’s mom was the breadwinner.

Due to a back injury from a Model T accident when she was younger, Dorothy’s mother needed to get away from Ohio’s cold and icy weather, so when Dorothy was 7 the family trio moved under doctor’s orders to California. Dorothy graduated from San Gabriel Mission High School and earned a 2-year Secretarial Degree at Mount San Antonio College. She then met Tom Grapensteter and they were married at All Souls Catholic Church on June 25, 1960.

California was growing fast, and Dorothy (who nicknamed herself Dottie) and her husband Tom grabbed their first-born Debra and sought out the wilds of western Montana. Tom wanted to work at the new Libby Dam, but it was still in the drafting stages, so they found their way to Missoula, Montana, where their second child Tommy was born in 1968.

Undeveloped land was being sub-divided up 6-Mile Road in Huson in the 1960’s, and they purchased 18 acres and would drive from Missoula and spend weekends on the property in a make-shift A-shaped plastic tent while preparing the land to build their home. In 1970 they moved to the property and their 3^rd child David was born. Their 4^th child Laura was born in 1973.   

Farm life was an adventure, adding a tool shed, chicken shed, goat shed, rabbit hutches and a huge vegetable garden. Fencing was added around the pasture for 3 horses (Gypsie, Jackson, Tamaresi aka Tammy and Tazamir aka Tazi) and 3 cows (Sunshine, Moonbeam and Starfire). Also on the farm were 3 dogs (Sean, Mandy and Sandy) and many cats (Smokey, Taffy, Bootsie, Smooch, Ripley, and all the feral cats). For several years there were 4-H sheep and pigs.  Dottie tried her hand milking goats and made goat cheese, but soon found that was too much work. Her husband Tom purchased a tractor and haying equipment and they put up hay every year. Later a large deck was added to the house where potted flowers were grown, and humming birds frequented their feeders.

One time when good friends of the family were between houses, Dottie and Tom invited an entire family of 6 to stay with them in their modest Huson home. There were 4 adults and 8 kids, and one bathroom! Dottie continued to welcome friends to temporarily live in her home over the years, and if you just came to visit, you were always offered food and drink.

After 22 years of marriage, Dottie and Tom divorced. Because Dottie was an only child, she always wanted a large family. At age 42, her life made a big change. She met a man named Leland Slater, and was blessed again in 1982 when her 5^th child Jeannette was born. Dottie was thrilled to have 5 children, 7 grandchildren, and 5 great-grandchildren, who were her pride and joy.  

Believe it or not, Dottie was a rather reserved and shy mother in her early, young-family days.  She settled into the homemaker’s life of raising her children. She cooked every meal from scratch and made a point of the family saying grace and sharing dinner together every evening. The family enjoyed home-made bread and baked desserts.

Crafty, detailed and not afraid to try new things, Dottie crocheted snowflakes with delicate intricacy for the Christmas tree. Her kids watched TV while Dottie’s knitting needles clicked, barely looking at the knitted creation. She knitted sweaters for each of her children whether they wanted them or not, and made them wear their sweaters to church the following Sunday after another was completed. Sometimes she made matching mittens with the extra yarn (she found gloves were too hard to knit). Dottie also sewed a lot of clothes, especially long gowns for Debbie for her musical concerts and dances. The two younger sisters wore Debbie’s hand-me-down dresses. There was also an era of macrame and wine making, including several batches of dandelion wine. Dottie tried her hand at painting and making pottery. She made a few bird houses to put around the property, and enjoyed watching the birds fly back and forth feeding their young.  

Holidays were always enjoyed at the household; Valentines, Easter, 4^th of July gatherings, Thanksgiving, Christmas (the tree and nativity stayed up well into the next year). She used to make her own braided bread wreath for the table centerpiece and decorate it with Easter grass, colored eggs and candy. Dottie loved her candy, and for safekeeping, would hide it away in containers within the house! Dottie saved almost everything, just in case she or someone needed it later. 

During her leisure time, Dottie watched her Soap Operas on TV, and vicariously traveled by watching Discovery and History channels on TV.  Finally in 2009, a cruise with two close friends to the Hawaiian Islands was a great highlight in her life. She traveled to the Washington ocean beaches and even decorated her bathroom in a nautical theme, complete with a round fishbowl.  

Dottie enjoyed many genres of music from all eras and listened to the MTPR radio channel. Her favorite concerts she attended were Willie Nelson and Neil Diamond. Dottie loved to dance, and she would be the first one to dance during an outdoor public band concert, such as the Flathead Lake Blues Festival in Polson, Montana. For a short time, she took guitar lessons; “These Boots Are Made for Walking” was her song, as she wrestled with the chords and tried to sing along too.   

As life went on, Dottie became more talkative, incessantly talkative one might say, and at a boisterous volume. She would enter a room of people while talking loudly as if to say “I’m here now!”  She was always excited to engage in conversation. That said, Dottie also made a point not to ask people ‘How are you?’ because as she put it “You get nothing from Fine, Good, or Doing Well. There’s no conversation from that.”  She said “I like to ask people ‘What’s the last fun thing you’ve done?’ because then you’ll hear an actual story.” Continuing on, she said “You’ll then get a chance to honestly connect and learn something about a person, and you’ll have a real conversation.” Dottie always ending a conversation in a cheerful note, whether in person or over the phone, and had a very positive outlook on life. She adored each of her 5 children’s lives and always made a point of keeping in touch with them, as well as her relatives and close friends.

Dottie and her camera were joined at the…purse. That camera (changing shape, style and technology from 110 film, 35 mm, to digital) went with her to all events and outings. She would talk with people from all backgrounds and walks of life, anywhere, anytime; on the phone or in person, holding up grocery check-out lines... It was not uncommon for her to take pictures of people she just met as if they were life-long friends, get double prints made, and go back and give that person their picture or send it in the mail. (If you are reading this, most likely you were the subject in front of her camera!) It didn’t matter if she knew you for years or she just met you, your picture might have been taken if the mood struck her. “Now wait-” she had to back up, and back up some more, and a bit more, to get all the group in the picture!

Wanting to earn money, Dottie took on a variety of part-time jobs, beginning with housekeeping positions and Meadow Gold door-to-door sales. Later, she was cook and nanny at Bladholms Ranch which came to be owned by Bob Ward. She worked for Bud King at King Ranch before it was a golf course. Dottie worked in the bakery department at Rosauers in Missoula.  Her favorite part was getting on the intercom and announcing the fresh baked goodies that just came out of the oven. Customers loved her intercom announcements as they were drawn over to purchase their treats.  Next came Missoula School District 1 preparing food for all the Missoula schools. Lastly, Dottie worked at the Frenchtown High School cafeteria.  After 15 years, she hung up her apron at the cafeteria and retired at age 65 on her birthday and not a day later.

Years ago, Dottie joined Garden City Club and was voted in as the secretary. Talking with other gardeners of like mind was a lot of fun for her.  People moved on and the club eventually disbanded. A few years passed and Dottie petitioned to use the remaining funds in the club’s account to have a blue spruce tree planted at the Nine Mile Community Center. A dedication plaque was also added to honor the entire group. To date, the blue spruce tree continues to thrive. Dottie lived for these social gatherings, especially church coffee hour, annual town events, Christian Singles, Line Dancing, Curves, and her Senior Luncheons.

On June 16, 2023, attending her granddaughter Brittani and Luke’s wedding was Dottie’s last treasured event in her life. Dottie spoke highly of it. She danced and took lots of pictures.

Life takes a turn, and Dottie’s eyesight was reduced to just peripheral vision, so she hung up her car keys. Lastly, Gynecological Metastatic Cancer got the better of her and she was “going home” as she put it, and after 83 years of “life on this beautiful earth,” on May 17, 2024 she was called to heaven from her home in Huson, Montana. It was a beautiful sunny morning with blue sky and white fluffy clouds to guide Dottie up to heaven. Throughout Dottie’s life, she remained positive with life’s challenges, and she embraced the beautiful earth that God created. Dottie’s last words written are “Aloha – God Bless You All.”

Monetary donations to Dottie’s beloved

St. John the Baptist Catholic Church

would forever send warmth to her heavenly heart.

St. John The Baptist Catholic Church

16680 Main Street, P.O. Box 329

Frenchtown, Montana 59834-0329

stjohnthebaptist@protonmail.com

406-686-4492